In reviewing events from 2020 I have identified several events that should not go unnoticed and for which special awards should be issued.
To Senator Toomey, the Ostrich Head in Sand Award for joining the opposition by insisting that PA elections 2020 were pure as the driven snow. Who was doing the driving? When Philadelphia won’t contain looters why should we expect them to provide honest elections?
The Benedict Arnold—Urine Spector Award again goes to those Bedford County natives who collaborated with UPMC in removing the birthing facility as UPMC again “improves patent care” by moving yet another service from the local facility to Altoona. Abolition of local stress tests joins birthing as a service discontinued locally. How much more improvement in services can we expect?
The Do as I Say Not As I Do Award to the Emperor Tommy Wuff and his collaborators: Rachel Levine, Tommy & Company will wear masks only on the rarest of occasions. Runner up are the many sign-language interpreters for all levels of state government who never speak anything but never wear masks.
Special award as Chintziest Employers of the County: Rambo Josh and his Merry Band: advertising to pay $8.13 an hour for an employee in minor judiciary. Have you thought of charging folks for privilege of working for you?
If Ya Cannot Lick Em, Join Em Roto Call Award to Congressman Joyce whose requests to “come join us and let us reason together” phone confabs are a real nuisance. Gee, Doc, I thought you were going to act to rein in those unwanted calls. Physician, heal thyself.
The Kim Il-Sung Josef Stalin Democratic Vote Award again goes to the Bedford County Historical Society whose secret nominating board sent out ballots with 4 names and instructions to vote for 4, no write-ins permitted. And the County Commissars force taxpayers help fund a group using such anti-republican measures?
To the Bedford Skule Bored: You have too much of taxpayers’ money in planning to buy, tear down, and remove a perfectly good property from tax rolls to build a parking lot.
I Cannot Believe It Award: to Philadelphia officials who allowed rioters & looters to commit felonies without arresting them, but who prosecute restaurants for being open in violation of Emperor Tommy’s edit. Taking a lesson in bad government from Left Coast?
Grand Prize: Darwin Award: to Bedford County Commissars for charging taxpayers who have the audacity to question their property assessments. This latest insult joins the largest tax increase in county history enacted as soon as the Commissars were safely reelected last year. Lucky for Kernel Tripledipper and Rambo Josh that the Tea Party disbanded locally. What’s next? Installing pay turn stiles at the entrances to the courthouse?
James B Whisker